The Hardest Thing for People To Do
It’s not love. It’s not remembering. It’s not being kind. It’s not being patient. It’s not saying, “I’m sorry.” But it is
Have you ever held a grudge? Are you currently holding one? More often than not, I hear stories of victims refusing to grant pardon to someone because it brings them comfort. They wind up building a bulletproof like emotional armor to protect their hearts. And when they do, they become hostile and bitter. Bitterness and grudges are silent killers. They have the power to destroy all types of relationships. The effects aren’t sudden. It’s like a snail traveling from point A to B, it is slow but it is progressive. In like manner, they are like a ticking time bomb waiting to go off. Tick, tick, tick, tick … BOOM! Just like that, it explodes.
I’m going to be totally transparent with you. It hurts to forgive. At least for me it does. In the past, I found it difficult to forgive … particularly those who haven’t earned or asked for forgiveness. Part of our subconscious is wired to retaliate to the person by holding a grudge.
Why is it so hard and painful to forgive? Forgiving someone requires you to put your “self” aside. The act of humbling oneself is heart wrenching. Especially when the offender is completely wrong.
Another aspect of forgiveness that is painful is forgetting the offense. If you are going to forgive, you are going to have to FORGET.
I get it! The person lied about you and never apologized.
I get it! The person betrayed, cheated on you and aren’t remorseful for what they did.
I get it! You’ve been abused or molested by the person and you want them to suffer more.
I get it! Forgiving someone like they never hurt you seems unfair.
I get it! The person keeps on repeating the offense and isn’t deserving of your compassion.
In case you’ve declared and decreed 2018 to be YOUR year, you will have to FORGIVE and FORGET, regardless of who the offender is and what they did. This is going to be the commencement of your breakthrough.
You are probably asking me, “Why forget?” Let me ask you this, why remember? God says in Isaiah 43:24 that when He forgives you, He remembers “your sins no more.” One of the reasons why you should forget is to MOVE ON. Here is a little sticky note message for you. ForGIVE is for the offender. You are GIVing them mercy. And ForGET is for the offended. You are GETting peace by setting yourself free from resentment. If you are expecting changes in 2018, you can’t bring 2017’s hurt and pain with you. Constantly remembering the offense will make you relieve the hurt. You then will begin to harbor resentment and bitterness. If you remain BITTER you can never become BETTER.
God wants better for you and I. However, the better that God wants for us will be dispensed when we align our actions with His Word. God is NOT going to forgive us beyond the measure we are willing to forgive someone (Matt 6:15).
As I mature I realize that regret and lack of forgiveness are self-inflicted wounds. While the person whom you choose not to forgive is sleeping, you are up being miserable. Free yourself from this torture. Do you want God to disburse a floodgate of blessings over your life? You need to prioritize reconciliation. You may have heard people asking to sow a financial seed for a breakthrough. But, I am asking you to sow a different kind of seed, sow a seed of forgiveness. Find the countless number of scriptures that talk about forgiveness and put them into practice. This is going to be a great year for you. Start by removing the emotional dead weighs that are weighing you down. Forgive and forget, life is so much better with people around.
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Thank you for reading.